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Propitiation. Theodicy. Antonym. Symbiotic. Expiation. Equivocal.

At the moment my most common google searches are words. I wanted to write a massive list but I can’t even remember most of them. And the thing is, I don’t remember words being this hard to remember when I was younger. I’m not sure whether this is because I care more about precision now, mostly because I come across these words in essays or are theology specific, or if I could just absorb words better.

For instance. Propitiation – ‘the turning away of wrath by an offering. In relation to soteriology, propitiation means placating or satisfying the wrath of God by the atoning sacrifice of Christ.’ I just had to look this up now. I looked it up this morning. I wrote several paragraphs of an essay on it and I still can’t define that word. I can talk about it to you. I can’t point you to examples. But the connection between that word and that definition, it just isn’t quite happening.

I think I might have to start an online dictionary and giving myself word tests. I just bloody well want words to stick. And not just stick but be automatic. It’s only as I’ve been annoyed with trying to learn these words that I realise quite how much sense we get from things. When I’m replacing propitiation mentally with a long sentence to explain it – I realise how many other words could need this to. And yet they don’t.

Its kind of amazing really. How much flavour and how many pictures and just how much muchness is within words. Is that something we are more likely to pick up on as a child? Or are just some words more sticky than others?

And please tell me someone else feels like this too?

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